Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Tug-o-War

I know most of you are confused about my love life bc I keep jumping between two guys. Adrian & Ernest. To be completely honest, I'm confused. Shit. Lol.

Okay here's the deal.

Adrian is basically what I would consider THE ONE for me. Maybe for now, maybe for awhile, maybe forever. We get along SO well, talk about anything, when I talk to him, there are NO weird feelings, I say how and what I feel. He can deal with my mouth & attitude. He has NO kids. He has a future in music. He's hard-working. He's my age. You follow me? The only thing is.. He's in Pittsburgh. I met him through his cousin, my ex. Yes I know. Terrible. But they talked about it, my ex and I still speak to each other and yadda yadda yadda. I mean we have our shit planned out. He's supposed to come down here this summer, we'll see how we get along. Since he got accepted to the music program at his school, I'm supposed to move up there when I finish and we're gonna get two Siberian Huskies named Mya & Jay. Then after awhile, two kids. He wants 4. No thanks.



Ernest on the other hand.. is complete opposite of Adrian. I mean, don't get me wrong, he loves and I know that, but he's a dope dealer, and is consistently found by some kind of trouble. Since we've been together, (January), he's been in jail 4 or 5 times, one of those times, he went in on my birthday! He has a son. Puts money before ANYTHING. I see him once in awhile, while I'm used to someone being THERE, I appreciate the space, but come on. Idk. Maybe it's the bad boy in him. He plans on taking me one day and just moving somewhere. =/ He panics when I get sick bc he thinks I'm pregnant. I don't want his child, no matter how much I love him.

Idk. I'm TORN. Adrian has been there since around November. He says if we were closer, it would definitely be easier. When I was drunk off my ass, he stayed on the phone, throwing up in his ear and everything, where was Ernest? Gambling. When I was sick, Ernest was outta town, taking care of money. Ugh.

Idk. I guess I'll see how Adrian and I are when he comes and visit. Ya know?

8 comments:

AUDREY said...

Adrien seems wonderful =/

--Miami said...

only thing im confused on is....are they related? or was that somebody else?

--Miami said...

ohhhh ok well now after reading, i say choice number 1 seems the right way to go.

it just seems the pros with him out weigh the pros with option 2.

--Miami said...

and thanks on the pics lol :-)

--Miami said...

i actually think it'll work out with yall. even tho i dont know the full FULL details of it.

but like you said that seeing eachother one regular will tell whats gonna happen.

i hope it does work out either way. you deserve to be happy.

--Miami said...

your welcome :-)

COOLKID24 said...

I DONT KNOW ABOUT YALL BUT I WANNA HERE MORE ABOUT THIS STORY LIKE SERIOUSLY THIS COULD REALLY HAVE THE MAKINGS OF A TV DRAMA DURING PRIMETIME ON A MAJOR BROADCASTING CHANNEL LOL TELL US MORE AND ERNEST SEEMS LIKE ME MINUS FULL GANSTA IN HIM IM ONLY A QUARTER GANGSTA OR NOT EVEN I HAVE GANGSTA TENDENCIES LOL

Anonymous said...

Ohhh ok ok! I like the breakdown of the two :D now as you kno, I have BEEN THERE DONE THAT with the "DBoys" lol and its cool for a min, its cool but I told myself a loooong time ago that first off; I CAN'T bring him home [wtf would my parents think?] and also as with all "criminals" they're gonna get caught [over and over] and that's just ugh. I been there with my ex [going to see him in County] and that is NOT whats up!

All imma say is that if he won't leave "the game" soon, then just STEP! Believe me, if you stay, shit WILL get potentially worse because you gotta friggin WORRY so much! ugh!

Adrian; that's cool he's on the straight and narrow! at least he has goals and including them WITH YOU! awww yall planning yall future together! :D yay!! I stay stick with A!

Ernest: its cool to just FUCK them, ya kno but trying to be the "ride or die" chick like in the songs and movies is just that...fantasy! pfft! I mean them DBoys HAVE SOME GOOD D...and some money but that's all they can offer you. *sigh*

Judes, you're not a chickenhead hoodrat and you deserve better [for the future and your future kids] so yea...just have fun with Ernest when he comes around [since he dont be around much] and just keep it moving...gotta throw those other feelings away. DBOYS need love too, but their love does not equate REAL, COHESIVE LOVE. Just like the money and drugs...they want FAST love and that's bullshit.

I'm writing too much again LOL!! :D holla laters!

****ADRIAN FOR THE WIN!****