Frustrations .

I`m sitting here on the verge of tears. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm so stressed out, so frustrated and I just keep overanalyzing about the same shit. I just got home from my parent's house. Alvin and I rode to Chiefland together. He sensed something was wrong with me. I'm never quiet around him, he kept asking what was wrong and I couldn't tell him. I don't know how to let him go. I would love to sit here and lie and tell you everything is great between us, but this friend named La'Quisha is sitting right there in the middle. I don't know if he still has feelings for her, I mean I guess he doesn't. I just don't know what to do anymore. This isn't me. I've never allowed myself to be put in this situation. He`s a nice guy, like I've said before, he`s grown on me and I love him to death, but it`s not like that at all. I dropped him off from football practice at another stadium I guess to play with his friends. He gave me a kiss and I went on my way.


I`m so ready for the end of this semester. I have never dreaded going to school this much. I feel like I`m at the point where I just don`t give a shit anymore and it`s horrible. I either need a break or just less classes. I`m trying to hold on and just get it over with but it`s been terrible. I hate Anatomy and Physiology, then theres Chemistry. Then I have ENC1102. Then Statistics. The only thing I like is Sociology! Then add two labs bc of A&P and Chemistry.. Thats 7 classes!

Another thing.. This whole roommate situation is NOT gonna work out. Not with this girl anyway. My friend and I are good. But this girl. I mean I've seen 6 different guys come over here, like Alvin said, thats a basketball team plus a substitute. Today I get a 37 dollar utility bill. What the fuck? This apt is all-inclusive. Which means someone went over the utility cap and bc I've been here the longest, they put the most on me? Hell no. Her ass brought her COUSINS laundry here and did it HERE. I'll be damned if they think I'ma pay for this shit.

Ugh. I`m done for now.

<3,
Ju-ju Bean